Power in Love

God is faithful to daily remind me of His multidimensional character.

Today, I am reminded of His power.

God fights for His people.

Because He loves His people.

He works daily unique miracles for His people.

God is For His people.

{At that time Joshua spoke to the Lord in the day when the Lord gave the Amorites over to the sons of Israel, 

and he said in the sight of Israel,

"Sun, stand still at Gibeon,

and moon, in the Valley of Aijalon."

And the sun stood still, and the moon stopped.

until the nation took vengeance on their enemies.

Is this not written in the Book of Jashar? 

The sun stopped in the midst of heaven and did not hurry to set for about a whole day. 

There has been no day like it before or since, when the Lord heeded the voice of a man, 

for the Lord fought for Israel.}

Joshua 10:12-14

As I read this, a familiar Kari Jobe song came on that has become an anthem for my life.

And I prayed this prayer to the God of Heaven and Earth:

Lord, you are so faithful, so constant, so loving and so true.

You are so powerful in all you do.

You are so patient, so gracious, so merciful and true.

You are wonderful in all you do.

You fill me, you see me, you know my every move.

And you love for me to sing to you.

I know that you are FOR me,

and I know that you will never forsake me in my weakness.

I know that you have come now, even if to write upon my heart to remind me who you are.

3-Day for the Cure: Day One

For months we prepared. 

Mentally. Physically. Monetarily. Emotionally. Spiritually. Relationally.

And finally, the day was here. 

Friday, November 18, 2011.

How best to explain the 3-day?

In pictures... 

with a few words scattered throughout [because, really, you have to hear a few stories!]

[disclaimer: most of these pictures were taken while we were actively walking... 

therefore, these are not my best work. 

and yet, i feel they still capture the essence of the experience :)]

Checking in and dropping off our bags at 5:30am Friday. Thank you Steve for taking us so early in the morning!! They were so organized and we had a letter-number combo on our little tags that told us where to put our luggage and where our tent would be later that day.

 We're here!

 Our motto.

 My buddy and me at the opening ceremony. We're really gonna do this!!

 Part of the opening ceremony... the survivor circle.

The flag in the middle has the names of those who have passed that are close to the 2011 walkers.

Both Mom and I wrote names on there.

 And we're off.... AHHHHHH!!!!

 3 miles in... pit stop one in Del Mar. That wasn't so bad!

 Around mile 5... our first official police friend. The police ROCKED.

 Leaving pit stop 2 and headed up Torrey Pines... about mile 6.

 Mom's best friend Saranne tracked us down around mile 10 and was our first personal cheerleader! 

It was so encouraging to see a familiar face and meant so much to have her there.

 Mile 12... lunch at La Jolla Shores! Lunch was fun. :)

Although, Mom and I had this thing where we would get to the stops and there would be tons of people... and by the time we were ready to go everyone had already left. This was the case at lunch. The rest of day one was a bit of playing catch-the-group and so 

 La Jolla in the afternoon. God continually reminded me of His faithfulness.

 From La Jolla to Bird Rock to Pacific Beach...

Just a few of the vehicles from the incredible team of police, fire rescue, bikers, and others who volunteered their time throughout the entire walk. From here, it was just a walking path to camp.

 Heading all the way down Mission Bay to Crown Point - the last miles of the day.

What a truly beautiful city to walk through.

[notice how few walkers there are compared to earlier? we sorta ended up close to the end... unintentionally...]

 We made it to camp! 

Day one [officially 21.5 miles]: complete!

 We got to camp right as the route was about to close (5:15pm), so it was dark. 

[most others had been at camp for a couple hours and were all settled in already]

We still had to get our tent, find our tent site, set up our tent, shower, eat dinner, change/unpack and get set up, and get to the evening entertainment... in one hour.

Therefore we didn't take many pictures.

However, praise God for the YMCA kids who volunteered to set up our tent for us!!!

 Finally showered, fed, and a bit more settled for the evening.

My twin/best pal/mom and me in our matching jammies.

[btw... we totally didn't need the scarves... but we brought them, so we wanted to wear them]

After the mishap of the air mattress [aka Jordanna pumped it up, pump died, Jordanna plugged air plug while we charged pump, came back to find the plug had come off and Jordanna had deflated the whole thing by laying across it before realizing such. battery lasted 5 min more... we needed 25 minutes. therefore: night one -- deflated air mattress]

[to take it further... this is happening at about 9-9:30pm... everyone around us is sound asleep. We quickly learned we could be playing catch up for a bit ... so is life for us! this is not complaining though... just to try to give you a glimpse of the day in our eyes. We had a great day!]

And then it was off to sleep for a sound solid 8 hours...

did I say that?

I meant,

an hour on the rough ground... tossing... turning... an hour here... what time is it, not time yet...

Nevertheless, it was a night to remember. In the best way possible. :-)

Only 40 miles to go...

I choose Faith

Lately in my quiet time and in my women's bible study,

I've been learning about faith.

I'm learning that faith requires both believing and obeying. And that unbelief is sin. Faith pleases God. 

Faith is taking God at His word. "Faith is the assurance of things hoped for and the conviction of things not seen." 

"Faith comes from hearing, and hearing from the Word of God." The outcome of faith is salvation. 

I'm reminded that trials will come. And that I am to be faithful through them. 

I must know His Word. I must choose to live by faith.

I'm learning about the rest of faith. Kay Arthur {incredible woman} says that 

the rest of faith is uniting the Word of God with faith for a particular situation. 

In every situation, I want to take what I know is true based on the Word of God, and then apply faith. 

I want to trust that God's Word is TRUTH. I want to believe God. I must believe God. 

And I must walk in obedience to His Word.

So many times, I have chosen to {not completely} trust God. 

To {pretty much} have faith {except for the little part that doubts}. 

To {worry instead of} rest in His promises. 

To believe {lies more than} the truth. 

But God is faithful even when I am not. He knows my heart, and He loves me regardless of what I think or do. 

He loves me even when I choose the passing pleasures of sinful words, thoughts and actions over the rest of faith.

He has given us His Word to live by. He has revealed His character to me. 

He spoke the world into existence. I have no problem believing this. 

Yet, I doubt His power in little life situations.

I am choosing to live by faith. 

I am choosing to rest in faith. 

I am trusting God. 

I am believing God. 

I choose to know the Word. 

I choose to obey God. 

I choose the Truth.

"For in just a very little while, "He who is coming will come and will not delay. 

But my righteous one will live by faith. And if he shrinks back, I will not be pleased with him." 

But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who believe and are saved."

Hebrews 10:37-39

Braving the journey

Sometimes I am encouraged by the testimony of another.

Sometimes I am convicted by the testimony of another.

Sometimes I am motivated by the testimony of another.

And sometimes, I am a combination of these, when hearing the testimony of another.

A few weeks ago, our church held what was called a ministry fair, where all of the different ministries of the church got to share what they offer and how God is working in their individual ministries. 

While walking through, I had the opportunity to meet Brooks, a missionary in Papua New Guinea.

His story is incredible. 

He and his beautiful wife, Nina, grew up in America and Brooks worked in Corporate America for years. 

They lived with their son, Beau, and were content with life 

until they began to feel that God had bigger plans for them. 

A few months later, they found themselves on a tiny plane headed to Papua New Guinea where they would live as missionaries and members of a tribe of people, learning their language and loving the people as Jesus loves them. 

Brooks shared the story of their very first journey into the tribe at church a few weeks ago. 

It was a journey of complete and total trust in the Lord.

Their plane landed in the middle of a forest-y area, 

and they canoed and hiked for the next few days to get to the tribe. 

Through swamps and brush, encountering all types of creatures.

And then they arrived.

They didn't know if the tribe would welcome them or try to kill them.

They were prepared to lose their lives for the sake of the gospel.

That was in 2004. 

I met them last month, after they had been a part of this culture for over 6 years.

They have 'family' there, and they are a part of the Yembi Yembi tribe.

They have killed crocodiles and 17 foot boa constrictors.

They have survived malaria.

They have underwent all types of criticism, hardship, grief, and physical challenges.

Through it all, they have lived in the name of Jesus Christ.

"I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death. For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain."

Philippians 1:20-21

The faith of Brooks and Nina encourages me.

It convicts me.

It motivates me.

It is real. Truly genuine. Raw. And beautiful.

"In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 

These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—

may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 

Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls."

1 Peter 1:6-9

God, I desire to have faith that is proved genuine 

and brings praise, glory and honor to you.

Give me boldness with every step I take.

And may every step and every thought be according to your will.

I praise you for your strength, your love, and your promises.

Help me to find joy in braving the journey.

This is my friend, Brooks.
(see that amazingly constructed table with a covering behind us? yah... he built that)

Please keep he and Nina and Beau in your prayers as they love these people and live amongst them.

Led by the Pillar

I was humbled and encouraged by this passage today:

"And the LORD went before them by day in a pillar of cloud  

to lead them along the way, 

and by night in a pillar of fire to give them light, 

that they might travel by day and by night.

The pillar of cloud by day and the pillar of fire by night  

did not depart from before the people." 

[Exodus 13:21-22]

Seriously, God is SO BIG. 

He can show up as a darn pillar of cloud, and a pillar of fire. 

What?! 

My God is mighty. 

He is powerful. 

He is steady and faithful. 

And He is in control.

He led the Israelites out of Egypt. 

He kept His promises to them. 

He sustained them. 

He still leads us today. 

He keeps His promises. 

He sustains His people.

“Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he,  

I am he who will sustain you. 

I have made you and I will carry you; 

I will sustain you and I will rescue you.” 

[Isaiah 46:4]

On a lighter note, is my mom not the cutest ever??

 

This picture sat open on my desktop today and made me smile so many times

in the midst of NCLEX questions.

Thanks for sending it my way, Stevie :) 

She and Steve went for a bike ride with her new bike at the beach on Labor Day. 

How sweet are they?!

I want to be just like her.

I can't wait to see her this weekend!

Picking up the pieces

Well, Friday is the day.
I've been studying a lot this week.
And I know, oh, maybe half of the stuff I need to know.
Like, I get 50-60% on every practice test I take.

I know I said I wasn't stressed
- and I've done pretty well -
but I am getting a bit overwhelmed
when I realize how much I need to know
to pass this test
and to be a great nurse.

I trust that God will give me wisdom in my work
and will protect my future patients
from any mistakes I may make.
At least, this is my prayer.

But when I think about the fact that my ability to take care of people
rests on a single "computer adaptive exam"
and my ability to differentiate between
"the NCLEX world" and "the real world,"
(literally they say this!)
I start to get a little overwhelmed.

It didn't help when I left Em and Bakes alone for a couple hours today
to find my bedspread ripped
and my room looking like it had snowed from all the stuffing
that was supposed to be so neatly tucked away inside
but was instead floating around my room.

That's kinda how my brain feels.
Tired, confused, and fragmented.
The stuff that should be so neatly compartmentalized
in its protective covering, or, head
is instead splattered all over the place
in no apparent order.

But God showed me His grace and His faithfulness
tonight in my elderly neighbor
whom I took a walk with
and who told me she would try to remember to pray for me on Friday.

and last night in two encouraging scriptures from my sister:

one from the book of Isaiah -
"Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand." 
Isaiah 41:10

and the other from the mouth of Jesus -
"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." 
John 14:27

And in an email from my mom to tell me she's proud of me
before I even pass the darn thing.
Because, it's not really about passing.
But it would be nice if that was a result :)

And so, time continues to move forward
and I pray God will help me make sense of the stuffing scattered about
to answer each question wisely and accurately.

Regardless of the outcome on Friday,
I will trust in the Lord.
For He is worthy to be praised.

"But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed." 
2 Corinthians 4:7-9

Dear Jesus,

Thanks for bible study last night. Thanks for a group of girls who really love you and want to learn about you. Thanks for great conversations and friends and tea and laughter. And for giving us your spirit and your armor.

Thanks for my husband. Thanks for the fact that he misses me when I'm gone and gets excited when I come home. And thanks for an evening of nothing on the calendar tonight. Finally! Not that I don't love activities - I do. But it's sure nice to be home together.

Thanks for Emma. Thanks for blessing us with a little animal who cuddles with us in the morning. Well, with me until J wakes up quite a bit later. :)

Thanks for getting me up early this morning to spend some time with you. I do it sometimes, even often, but not for long enough, ever. So thanks for today.

Please help me get this paper done today. I really have to concentrate and I'm kinda struggling to be focused. Thanks for caring about little things like a paper.

Thanks for being faithful when I'm not, for being strong when I'm weak, and for loving me when I don't feel very lovable. But I love you.

Amen.

A reminder to be thankful

My Rehabilitative Nursing class was extra special this week. My professor also teaches at my Alma Mater, and had one of her nursing students come and share about her experience with a spinal cord injury. She told us the story of her son, Patrick Ivison, who was hit by a car when he was 14 months old and she was 23 years old. He suffered a C4-C5 incomplete spinal cord injury, and became a quadriplegic. At first, they weren't sure if he would even survive. He did, but with a lifelong wheelchair and required care every minute of the day. He is now 15 years old. You can read his full story here.

UPDATE: Patrick got a service dog named Kona in August and is training him. We got to meet Kona in class Monday. I think service dogs are such an amazing gift. Watch Kona in training here!

I was so humbled by this family. Jennifer, Patrick's mom, was my age when she was faced with a terrible new reality. Her entire life changed in a moment. And she continued on. She took care of her son and trusted the Lord, and He took care of them. I love that. I love that she didn't give up. Oh I'm sure there were so many times she wanted to. But she didn't. And now she's in nursing school. Just like me. I talked with her a bit after class and encouraged her in her journey and applauded her efforts thus far in life.

Patrick challenged me as well. What an amazing kid. 15 years old, and a little heartthrob. He had the very best attitude he could have, and has truly turned his experience into his life's ambition. He shares his story with others in hopes of encouraging them.

Patrick and Jennifer, you have challenged me to have a better attitude. I am so blessed to be alive and healthy (minus being sick currently, but that will pass). I get to go to nursing school, to live with and be married to my best friend. I have an incredible family who loves me and whom I love, and the sweetest puppy I could have asked for. I have a hilarious bird who whistles to me and a car that runs, and that I can drive and walk and laugh.

And yet I complain. Why do we complain? Complaining is wasted effort. I want to be truly thankful for what I have been blessed with. God is good all the time, and even when life is difficult and unfair, He is still good. So thank you Lord for your faithfulness in Jennifer and Patrick's lives, and thank you for your faithfulness in mine. Help me to remember this simple truth. And help me to share it with my patients and loved ones.